Every hear your mother say, in response, “Well, if everyone else was jumping over a cliff, would you want to too?!!!!” in a very exasperated tone implying that sooner or later you might want to THINK FOR YOURSELF.
Oh yeah. I heard that one and several other variations, all of which implied to a not smart-as-I-thought-I-was teenager that I needed to get a clue and at the very best, use the brain that the good Lord handed me.
So…here’s my addition to the sincere and heartfelt onslaught of corny essays, sappy tributes and tear-jerking baby pictures.
My aunt sent this poem to me shortly after the birth of our first son. I was struggling a bit with this new thing called “motherhood” and a bad case of Baby Blues wasn’t helping. At all. I was pretty sure there was no way that the eight pound bundle of grins, poops, farts, throw-ups and I would survive till he was the ripe old age of six months!
Note: a week after giving birth, NBC had the audacity to kill off Little Joe’s wife and baby in the premiere of Bonanza‘s last season. I cried for days. BB and my mother exchanged worried glances for this was a woman who didn’t cry. Ever.
I needed a good laugh and I remember laughing until I tears were rolling. Man, I needed uplifting and this did it.
There are at least hundred of versions of this poem and it seems it originated from Ireland/ Yuma State Prison/Scotland/barbershop lore. Tell me if I’m wrong!! 🙂 It still makes me laugh. Especially since I have squeezed my grandbabies that hard. Figure it out.
When me prayers were early said,
Who tucked me in me widdle bed
And spanked me butt till it was red?
Who took me from my crazy cot
And sat me on an ice-cold pot
And made me pee if I could not?
And when the morning light had come,
And me widdle crib did dribble some,
Who wiped me tiny widdle butt?
Who did me hair so neatly part,
And pressed me gently to her heart,
And sometimes squeeze me till me fart?
With that, I bid you a fond Mother’s Day and remember…do not force a child to pee. Or not pee. Just ask the child psychiatrists out there.